SPEAKER_01 0:34

Hey there, Marissa here. I have a piece of jewelry, a necklace that I wear every day. And if you've ever seen me on video, you'll notice that you probably can't make out the word. The word is redefined, and it's a reminder to me to think of myself in a new way and not play those old stories about myself, about insecurity and other things that would hold me back. And today I want to ask you one question. What defines you? Do your credentials define you, or financial status, or success, or perhaps the lack, or struggles, or even past failures? Now I'm going to share a very special interview that I did about two and a half years ago. It's pre-pandemic. This was pre-podcast days before I had a podcast. And it was with a very special person, Ray Edwards, who I admire very much. He is a successful online entrepreneur, and he's best known for his copywriting. In fact, I have been certified through his program as well. And he's someone that has worked with some real key players like Michael Hyatt and Amy Porterfield and Pat Flynn, Cliff Ravenskraft, uh so many entrepreneurs. And we did this interview, and the content was relevant then, and it's relevant today. And it's really being able to see the personal struggles of a very public figure and how he reframes his thinking to be able to share his knowledge with the world. Now, Ray is someone that I respect very, very much. He's so knowledgeable, he's kind, he's generous, and he does have a deep desire to create a difference in this world. And that's one of the things that I really admire about him. Despite some of his challenges, he just continues to provide content to help and support. And I am privileged to be part of the team and I help up-and-coming copywriters get certified. And whenever the team says Marissa, can you? I just say yes because I admire this man so much. But let me warn you, the audio is not as good on my end, but I want you to listen to what he has to say because I did not have a microphone at the time. This was pre-podcast days. So my audio is not so great, but I want you to focus on what Ray has to share because it's so, so important and so full of wisdom. So without further ado, here's Redefined to Live Your Best Life with guest Ray Edwards. Welcome. I'm Arissa Shadrick, host of the Resilient Faith Online Show. I'm an online marketing coach and certified copywriter. In this podcast, you'll find a different perspective to the external and internal challenges we face as online content creators. Join me for some inspiration and practical tips as we create positive change online. To connect with me and my private Facebook group, go to marissashadrick.com forward slash community. Do you want daily resilience as an online entrepreneur so you can share your best contribution online? Hi, I'm Marissa Shadrick. I'm here to help you find daily resilience and work in life. And with me today is none other someone that I admire very much and I consider a friend, Mr. Ray Edwards. Hi, Ray. How are you doing?

SPEAKER_00 4:05

Hi, great. Thank you for that. I consider you a friend also.

SPEAKER_01 4:09

Thank you. I know many people know you, but give us a little bit about who you are.

SPEAKER_00 4:13

Well, I'm probably best known as a copywriter, the person who writes the words that sells products and services. I've had clients like Tony Robbins, Michael Hyatt, Amy Porterfield, uh Pat Flynn, Cliff Ravenscraft, a lot of other famous people. I've helped sell about, I'm getting close to about $400 million in sales of products and services online. That's been my specialty. That's how most people know me. I have a podcast that airs weekly. I love entrepreneurship, I love business, and I love to talk about resilience because it's something we all need more of, I think.

SPEAKER_01 4:42

I think so too. Just in context, so everybody understands uh where I'm headed with resilience. Most people consider resilience like a comeback from a setback. Something, maybe they had a failure, maybe there was a situation that happened and they had to find a way to be able to get back on their feet and move on. This is more finding those daily things that we do for life to find daily resilience. So when we do have those tragedies that happen, we can come back a little faster. And I know you've had, I want to start with life, and I just love the heart of your story, and I think it would help so many people to know in life you've had a few setbacks. Um, and everybody has ups and downs in life, everybody has things, challenges that come up, but you specifically um struggled with depression. So I've been wondering if you can speak to that. How did you find daily resilience as you came out of that depression?

SPEAKER_00 5:41

Well, it's been more than one cycle of that, so um, there's probably a longer answer, but the real true answer is there's been two key components to my being able to do that, and that has been my faith and my relationship with God. And you know, just because you have faith and relationship with God doesn't mean you won't be depressed. Even Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane had a moment of anguish and anxiety. Um, but that's been key, that relationship. And then my wife, who is the person who the one person in my life who is always ready to step in and say, Hey, you're not being yourself. This is not the best version of you. And she has various ways of of languaging it. Sometimes I need tough love, sometimes I need tender love, but whichever it is I need, she knows and she gives me that. And usually I end up listening to her eventually. So it's been those two things. And a knowledge, you know, learning part of it is self-awareness, learning to know, okay, I recognize the behavior I'm engaging in right now. This is not me at my best. And giving yourself the grace to realize, okay, this is not me at my best, but this is not the new normal. This is not gonna last forever. And the fact that you can recognize it and see it and know, okay, this is not really how I want to be or how I normally am, that's a big key component of resilience because it lets you know that there's something more, better, different in store in the future. And that gives you the the whole with depression, the whole definition of depression is the inability to construct a positive future mentally. So if you can say to yourself, it looks really bad now, but this is not really how I am normally, this is not me at my best, I will be better tomorrow or the next day or next week. You're constructing a hopeful future. So you're already one step out of the hole called depression.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

Right, right. I love it because you in that explanation, there was community because you have your wife. There's always other people. I think we weren't meant to do this life by ourselves. And then faith, which we have in common, um, that's a big part of it. But you also talked about the self-management, your own accountability to ask those critical questions to yourself. And I think that's important uh when we do that. And as you've continued in life, you've been able to be resilient now with a huge challenge. You want to tell us a little bit about your biggest challenge right now that you find you need that daily resilience?

SPEAKER_00 8:06

Sure. Um, about almost nine years ago, I was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease, which is a degenerative neurological disorder, and it's progressive, which means it's it only gets worse and you can't stop it and they can't cure it. It's kind of like the Terminator. Um, but it's not terminal. That's one thing I'd like to clear up. People hear that disease name and think, oh, you have a terminal disease. No, I do not. Well, we all do, it's called life.

SPEAKER_01 8:31

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 8:32

We're all born with it, we're all infected with it. So there, deal with that. But uh it's in the Parkinson's community, it's often said you die with Parkinson's, not of Parkinson's. But it can make the intervening period less comfortable. It's uh it it interferes with your motor control. You people think it's a shaking disease. There is some tremor. I have a little bit right now. Just a little. But there's other things that happen. You you find it more difficult to walk sometimes, difficult to do daily things that most people take for granted, like feeding yourself. It affects my speech sometimes more than other times. Like right now, it's a little bit affected. Um, so it is it is something that is ever present. It's not a problem that you can put in the back of your mind and forget about it, because it's always asserting itself, making itself known to you. And so that's a that's a challenge. And the the knowledge that unless and until God intervenes and lifts it from me, or until I'm done with this particular part of my journey, uh that I have to face it and deal with it, and it may get worse, that can be daunting. That can contribute to well depression, for instance. But I have a core belief. I used to say life doesn't happen to us, it happens for us. Now I'm more inclined to say life doesn't happen to us, it happens through us. Because we are the filter through which the meaning comes out. So I could take this diagnosis and say, Well, this is a horrible thing, it's ruined my life, my life is over. I'm old before my time, I'm I'm never gonna be the same. I'm uh I can't do here's a list of things I can't do. That's one way I can filter this experience, or I can filter it this way. I could say, Well, this gives me the chance to become more empathetic, to understand people's pain more, to become a better person, which I have. I've become more patient, I've I've slowed down because I have to slow down. That's one of the symptoms. You slow down. So, I mean, there's people who pay thousands of dollars to go to retreats to learn how to slow down. I don't I don't have to pay anything, I get it for free.

unknown 10:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:22

Uh I it's taught me to have a sense of humor about it, because I mean, in the end, none of it really matters. We're all just wearing these temporary spacesuits for a while. So whatever's bugging us in a spacesuit, we'll be rid of it before too long and we'll be into a better situation. Whatever you may believe, particularly, I think you'll be better off.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

What do you think about our culture today? Do you think they embrace that resilience? Or do you think that's why there's so many people struggling and so many people hurting out there?

SPEAKER_00 10:53

I think I think overall the culture does want to embrace it. I think they don't know how. Yeah. And so I think the frustration for people is they hear lots of talk about grit and resilience and perseverance, and it sounds good to them and it rings true, and they feel like, yes, that's what I want. And then very few people can answer, can give them a real solid answer as to, well, uh, okay, how do I do that? That's I think that's the challenge. That's where frustration comes from.

SPEAKER_01 11:19

So you're just going. I mean, you're speaking, you're on social media, you're writing, you haven't stopped. I mean, you keep keep going. I think that's very inspiring for some people that might get a little lazy, like myself. It's very inspiring for us to know that you know, some of the owies that we think are so bad daily are not. We need it gives us perspective to see what's really true. And we want to give our best contribution, especially when we're online as entrepreneurs. And I think again, I love what you said, how it goes through us. It's so true. And life, your work, I believe, is an extension of your life. So if you get the life part down, I feel it's going to help you in work. So, as an entrepreneur, many online entrepreneurs get stuck. It's not about knowing. They know a lot of stuff. They maybe have a website, maybe they're all over social media, but they still get stuck. Do you think there's something in that resilience, the mindset, something that's holding them back?

SPEAKER_00 12:21

Yeah, they're not happy. And I lately I'm fascinated by the idea that there's nothing that's going to happen for us in the future. There's nothing out there somewhere that's going to make us happy. And we often operate from that perspective. We think, well, once I get this company built, I'll be happy. Once I make a million dollars, I'll be happy. Once I get my debt paid off, I'll be happy. Once I get my relationship straightened out, I'll be happy. That's not true. Those things will not make you happy. You're either happy or you're not. If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. But if you're not happy now, you won't be happy then. So this is something that Paul talked about. He said, I've learned the secret of being content, whether I have much or whether I have little. And that is the secret. The secret is you've got to learn to be happy right now. You have to learn it's a decision. You have to find something to be happy about, even when things are bad. I look, I have bad days with this condition. I have days that I'm not just lazy, I'm disabled, to be quite honest about it. Um but I can't let that steal my joy.

SPEAKER_01 13:23

Right.

SPEAKER_00 13:24

I'm not saying that I'm in that state thinking, oh great, I get to be like this today. That's not how it goes. But I do remind myself, this will pass. This is not what's important. I'll think about things that make me happier. If nothing else, I can play with my puppies. So we just find something. There's always some way, there's always some reason, some excuse to be happy. And I think that most of the time our emotional state is a habit. Think about somebody you know who's always angry about stuff. You know somebody like this, we all do. They get angry about everything. It's not that everything makes them angry, it's that they're angry and they use everything as an excuse to be angry.

SPEAKER_01 14:00

Right.

SPEAKER_00 14:01

That's their habit. Right. So if you're if you're not happy most of the time, time to develop a new habit.

SPEAKER_01 14:07

So as they're working online, if they are stuck, maybe they should step back a moment and do a little bit of reflection and see where they are as a person first. Because maybe it's not the work, maybe it's just them. They just need to stop, pause, take a walk, reflect, see what it is. I the self-assessment I think is so important. We need to see why we feel what we feel, why we're thinking what we're thinking. Would you agree with that?

SPEAKER_00 14:33

Yeah, I think self-awareness is key. And most people are not self-aware. Most people are in self-denial. They have an illusion, they have an illusion about what they should be, what how they should look, how they should behave, how they should feel. And they don't feel that way because it's not them. And then they get upset with themselves. And so they're in this cycle of self-loathing and hatred and anger and bitterness and frustration. And I think the first step is to love yourself, just tell you.

SPEAKER_01 14:58

That's gold, not self-assessment, but self-they have they're in denial. I think that's so true. That's so true. That's I gotta do that as a tweetable. That was really, really good. But anyway, so what you kind of told me what helps you as an online entrepreneur, your mindset, how you see things, your perspective, and you you self-assess yourself to be able to see, am I happy? Why am I not happy? Now, who has helped you to be resilient? Because I I believe we all need community. We weren't meant to be on an island. Who else has helped you to be resilient?

SPEAKER_00 15:32

There's my wife. There's um the members of the mastermind group that I run, and you're one of those people.

SPEAKER_01 15:38

Oh, that's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 15:40

My assistant Tiffany is very helpful in that regard. I mean, she's she's a person who's a truth teller. She doesn't have any problem saying, Hey, you're being a jerk today. What's going on?

SPEAKER_01 15:48

She's awesome. She's great.

SPEAKER_00 15:50

She is awesome.

SPEAKER_01 15:51

She's really tall.

SPEAKER_00 15:52

Uh she's tall. She is dead. She is dead. Um, there's my son. Uh, there's my dogs, there's God, there's my pastor. I I look one of the if I have one big shift that I made that's made a huge difference in my life, it's that embracing community and being transparent with your community. Because I used to be a non-people person. I didn't want to talk to anybody, didn't want anybody to know anything about what was going on with me. You asking how I was, it was always the same answer. Perfect! That's all you're gonna get from me. Yeah, and um, you're never gonna get any details, and that's that's a mistake. You isolate yourself, then you're in trouble. Because that's how that's how the wolves cull you from the herd. They isolate you from the herd, you're by yourself, now you're vulnerable. Yes, same way for us. As if if you think about being a sheep in a in a herd, in a flock, who's your adversary? The wolf. And the wolf wants you by yourself because that's what he can get at you. So don't be by yourself.

SPEAKER_01 16:52

Yeah, two more questions.

SPEAKER_00 16:53

Just find the courage to be honest.

SPEAKER_01 16:55

Yeah, absolutely. Um, two more questions. Who do you admire?

SPEAKER_00 16:59

Who do I admire? I admire you.

SPEAKER_01 17:02

Oh, that's so sweet. Oh, I'll take that. Thank you. It's true. And last question: what's on the horizon for business? As an online entrepreneur, I know you're up to a lot of stuff. Can you give us a little bit about what's on the horizon? What are you excited about?

SPEAKER_00 17:17

For me personally, or just business and business?

SPEAKER_01 17:19

Business in business that's coming up.

SPEAKER_00 17:22

Um, I'm excited about these three words that I've emblazed into my consciousness for the next year or so, probably ongoing, probably not just the next year. They are impartation, activation, and elevation. And usually when I get these words each year, they're not for other people, they're for me. This year they're for other people. Impartation means teaching and giving what I know, imparting what I have to offer to other people in fullness, not holding anything back, not saying, Well, I'm gonna keep the good stuff for myself or keep my deepest secrets for me. It's giving everything I've got, imparting it to other people. Activation means getting people activated so they start doing the stuff I'm teaching. And I want I want you know, I want my students to succeed beyond me. I think the mark of a good teacher is your students turn out better than you are. If you're a teacher whose students never exceed you, I don't think you're much of a teacher. I think you're more of a taskmaster. And then elevation is elevating other people's time in the spotlight above my own. The time when I desire to be in the spotlight as my primary goal has long since passed. I have the least interest in that I've ever had. Interestingly enough, I have more opportunities now than I ever had. Which I think is something God does that's funny. It's like, oh, you don't want it, then you're ready for it. But elevating other people, giving other people a platform, giving them helping them in whatever way I can, helping them grow their influence and impact in the world. That's what it's about for me now.

SPEAKER_01 18:47

That's so cool. And you're still doing copyright. I mean, you're still helping people learn how to be copywriters. Sure.

SPEAKER_00 18:53

Baby gotta have shoes.

SPEAKER_01 18:55

Yeah, yeah, which I think is amazing. It's awesome. Well, I really appreciate just how honest, authentic you are, Ray. And thank you so much for helping me and just joining me for this interview. I really appreciate it. I think a lot of people get a lot of value out of hearing kind of the backstory, the heart of the story of some online entrepreneurs. So thank you so much. Any last comments? Where can people find you if they want to connect? Where's the best place? Because I know you're everywhere. So where would you like them to be to find you and follow you?

SPEAKER_00 19:24

Pretty simple answer, just rayedwards.com. And there's links and there's opportunity to sign up for an email list and all the all the things that you normally would expect. Any final words to say? Yes, you are a very wise, powerful woman with a big mission in the world. I really support what you're doing, and I encourage everybody to follow along with your work because it's only going to get bigger and more impactful. You're one to watch. That's my final thought.

SPEAKER_01 19:48

Oh, thank you, Ray. Thank you so much. I appreciate that. Wow, wasn't that a great interview? I still can glean so much out of that interview I had with Ray, and that was like two and a half years ago. So relevant for today. And I'm going to provide a link to his website and on there on his about page, there's a little bit more. There's a video and it's a little mini film about his story. And I think you'll really love and benefit from watching that video. But I want to leave something for you. If you're struggling with finding resilience in your life, if there's something that you're struggling with right now and you're trying to figure out how to come back from a setback, let me share a verse with you. It's Philippians 4.8. And it goes like this. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right and pure and lovely and admirable. Think about these things that are excellent and worthy of praise. But I want to reread this verse, and this time I want you to apply it to you. I want you to redefine who you are. So I'm going to add to each one of these you. Okay? So here we go. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true about you and what is honorable about you, and right about you, and pure about you, and lovely about you, and admirable about you. Think about these things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Begin to redefine who you are and then begin to create positive change in the world. Thanks for listening so much. If this was helpful, I would love for you to rate and review the podcast. This helps me get this message out to more people, and I would really, truly, truly thank you for it. So until next time, take care. Bye bye.