SPEAKER_01 0:34

In life, we all run across obstacles. But what do you do when you are facing an obstacle? How do you turn an obstacle into an opportunity? That's exactly what we're going to talk about today with a very special guest that I have on the Resilient Faith Online Show.

SPEAKER_00 0:56

Welcome. I'm Arissa Shadrick, host of the Resilient Faith Online Show. I'm an online marketing coach and certified copywriter. In this podcast, you'll find a different perspective to the external and internal challenges we face as online content creators. Join me for some inspiration and practical tips as we create positive change online. To connect with me and my private Facebook group, go to marissach.com forward slash community.

SPEAKER_01 1:28

Hello, hello everyone. Marissa here, and I have an awesome guest today. She is a wife, a mother, and an author of a brand new book. Please welcome Becky. Hello, Becky. How are you? Hi, I'm doing great. How are you? I'm doing great. Why don't you introduce yourself and give us your full name and tell us a little bit about yourself so everybody can understand, give perspective and context as far as your background?

SPEAKER_02 1:57

Yeah, my name is Becky Zingali, and I'm married to Dwayne, and we have two wonderful daughters, Chloe and Ariasha. And I just published a book called Wonderfully Different, Wonderfully Me, which is kind of inspired by my daughter and well, both my daughters really, as well as my husband and our story.

SPEAKER_01 2:14

That's awesome. Now, Becky and I, we recently became friends. We met at a conference, uh, Mike Kim's conference. And I know in another podcast you probably heard me say that. I made a lot of friends at that conference. But Mike Kim had a wonderful conference and there were a lot of great speakers. And Becky and her husband were actually on a panel on stage answering questions as well. But we were sitting at the same table. And so, you know, as you go into a conference and you find a seat and there were some seats available, we just started chatting. And I found out that she was an author of this wonderful book. And of course, I think, I think I was the first one to buy a copy at that conference. Yes, I you were, yes. I was. I was the first one to buy a copy, and of course, I wanted to promote it. So as soon as I had an opportunity to share, because Mike Kim was having us, it was very interactive. I said, you know, I'm sitting next to Becky, she's got this wonderful book. You can't see it, but on the video, I'm holding up the book Wonderfully Different Wonderfully Me. And so Becky and I um connected and we started communicating a little bit about her story. And I just thought it was amazing. And I love the book so much. I gave it to my granddaughter. It's beautifully illustrated. Becky, tell us what inspired you to first tell us what the book is about and what inspired you to write this book.

SPEAKER_02 3:38

Okay. Well, Wonderfully Different, Wonderfully Me features a diverse group of children and celebrates each child's unique strength. Um, and my hope is that would it just it would inspire the reader um just to focus on the positive things about themselves and about others. Um, and I wanted a book where all children could see themselves in the story, whether they connect with the character's challenges or their physical appearance or interest or personality.

SPEAKER_01 4:01

Um that's awesome. And identifying yourself in a story, let's unpack that a little bit because I think we do that as adults. When we watch movies, we kind of identify with the protagonist or, you know, we identify with the journey at least. You know, and we can identify. So tell us a little bit about that, about being able to identify yourself in a story. What does that mean?

SPEAKER_02 4:26

Um, well, obviously, seeing yourself in the story, which when I was a child, like my sisters and I would always do that. We'd watch Little House and be like, well, obviously my older sister is Mary and I get to be Laura, the main character, because I'm the second child, you know.

unknown 4:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:38

We pick the I'm this person, you're that person, and then we'd play the story. And I see my own daughters do that. Um, they act out frozen over and over. So we introduce them to Little House so they can like, let's have a story that's less annoying to me. Different siblings, right? Yep, yeah, like really like, oh yeah, we've got two girls and they really connect with stories that have two sisters. Like Moana's good and those other stories, but there's only one girl, and so they can't play it because there's two of them.

SPEAKER_01 5:04

Yes, yes, for sure, for sure. So they can identify with it and it makes them feel like they're seen and heard, right? Yeah. Because they say, well, they're just like me, and they can see it, and they, like you said, they can play it out as well. So this, but what did you always want to write a book, or did this just kind of happen in your adulthood as a mom?

SPEAKER_02 5:28

I like when I was a kid, I always wrote stuff. And then I journaled a lot and I was a blogger as an adult. Um, and then Dwayne and I talked about writing a book after we read the book Wonder, because my husband has the same syndrome as the main character in Wonder. So that was the first time that he saw himself in a story.

SPEAKER_01 5:45

Oh, I see. I didn't know that. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 5:48

Yeah, he was like, This she wrote my story. Like, how did she know all this about me? And that was the first time that he saw himself like that well portrayed in a book. And then for me, because my sister was in a wheelchair, I really connected with the sister in the story. And it was probably the first time that I actually saw myself in a book like that because there's not very many stories about kids who have special needs.

SPEAKER_01 6:09

Gotcha. So tell us a little bit about Wonder in case uh no one has seen it yet. I know I heard about it and I have not seen it yet. I knew I know that Julia Roberts is in it, uh, but I don't know too much about the story. So give us a a little bit of background on that story. It's just I it says here, I'm looking on the internet, based on the New York Times bestseller. So it's based on the book.

unknown 6:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 6:33

So you got to read the book. The book is always better than the movie. Um, I'm not be biased because I'm an author. Um, yeah, so we read the book and watched the movie. And the book was required reading in like third and fourth grade classes in like our whole state, right when our daughter was born. So, you know, the main character has facial differences and wears a hearing aid just like my husband, looks like my husband, looks like our our younger daughter. So it was a really good icebreaker. Like when we saw kids third, fourth grade age, like staring at our daughter, staring at my husband, I would just be like, Hey, have you seen Wonder? And they're like, Yes, we read it for school and we just watched the movie. And I was like, they have the same syndrome as Augie. No way, that's so cool.

SPEAKER_01 7:13

Oh my gosh. So they made a connection.

SPEAKER_02 7:15

Yeah, we're like, well, that's cool that that's cool, because it's, I mean, it's not really that cool, but it's cool.

SPEAKER_01 7:21

Yeah, and the the movie itself, I mean, he becomes from what I can see from the description in there, he becomes sort of a a little hero there in the movie. And it's all about acceptance and really understanding, you know, the person, seeing the person beyond what the superficial and acceptance. So I'm I want to read the book now and watch the movie. But uh, so Dwayne was excited to see this movie, uh, and to read the book too. That's great. And so it's important for people to be able to see themselves in a story and see it unfold and not feel different or alone, knowing that there's others. And I guess most of us when we read books, we can identify with the author, whatever they're saying, um, especially in the Christian realm, too, when people read something and it has maybe a Christian perspective to it, they can identify with that as well. So this is wonderful because this book that you wrote is really going to help children because it has a variety of different children in this book so that they can all identify with the characters in this book, correct?

SPEAKER_02 8:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:35

Awesome. Who illustrated this book? Because it's beautifully done.

SPEAKER_02 8:39

Um, Lorento, who lives in Romania.

SPEAKER_01 8:42

Oh, okay. So we have different illustrations here. I mean, it's really beautiful. And one of the illustrations, I believe you said when we were chatting, is an illustration of your family. Is that correct?

SPEAKER_02 8:57

Yeah, well, the about the author illustration is our whole family.

SPEAKER_01 9:00

Yeah, that is cool. That is cool. That is so cool. How does it feel to be uh illustrated like that? It was fun. I bet.

SPEAKER_02 9:09

A lot of fun, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:10

What do the girls think about the book? And and uh what are the girls, how do the girls feel?

SPEAKER_02 9:15

How do they so my my younger daughter said it's her favorite book? So like, oh, thank you, honey, because she's in it. Um, and when the books arrived at our house, like she grabbed a book and she's like, This is my copy. I'm gonna be your first customer. I'm like, Well, I'm just I'm gonna give you the book. So I don't know if you're really a customer, but yes, honey, you can have a book. And she like wrote her name and stuff all over it and I was like, Well, now we know which one is yours, so I won't accidentally mail it to anybody.

SPEAKER_01 9:38

Right, right. Yeah now I know that when we started the podcast, we talked about taking obstacles and turning them into opportunities. Uh granted, it couldn't have been easy for your husband. I mean, there is a difficulty that surrounds all of this. How were you able to take obstacles? I mean, was your husband part of that just because of the way he's so positive and so outgoing? I mean, how were you able to turn the obstacle into an opportunity and bring so much positive light to all of this, not only for your own family, your children, but for so many children all around? How are you able to do that?

SPEAKER_02 10:22

I kind of want to start with start with Dwayne, because he definitely influenced the turning obstacles into opportunities. Um, Mike came at his conference, said, you know, you are the brand, you know, use your face. And Dwayne laughed and he's like, I've been using my face my whole life. You know, because he'll get up on stage and be like, You've seen me, you're never gonna forget me. And I mean, we meet people in random places that are like, I know you. Did you go to this youth group that I went to, you know, 20 years ago? And, you know, I don't, I'm not gonna recognize somebody that I met when I was 12 because we look so different as adults than we did as kids. But Dwayne, like, they remember him. So he's always used that, I think, to his advantage in marketing and things like that. Just be like, people know who I am, people recognize my face. He's also been really confident. He was able, like, he had a great sense of humor. He would say that he had an advantage because he says everyone gets bullied or picked on or teased about something, but people aren't very creative or original. So he already knew like exactly what they would say, and he already had a comeback, you know, and they're like, Your face looks crazy or whatever. He's like, I know, isn't it? They're like, Um, yes.

SPEAKER_01 11:27

He was able to diffuse those situations and yeah, yeah, yeah, because he already knows predictable what they were gonna say. That's awesome. Yeah, he is very uh outgoing and confident and very knowledgeable too, because uh Dwayne is in the marketing space, correct? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's awesome. That's awesome. So he was a great influence as well. Your children must have inspired you, I would guess.

SPEAKER_02 11:51

Yes, definitely. Um, wanting my daughter to be able to see herself in a story in the same way that Dwayne saw himself in Wonder. Um and we had we bought a lot of books that had kids who had hearing aids, but I actually couldn't find any that had kids who had facial differences other than Wonder, um, which she was, you know, a toddler, so she's not old enough for that book. Um, and also the hearing aids are usually the wrong type of hearing aids. So she would look at the pictures and be like, that's not what my hearing aids look like. They did it wrong. Oh sorry, honey.

SPEAKER_01 12:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 12:20

Um, so Dwayne's like, you blog, like write our story, write a book with our kids in it so she can see herself and other kids who are like her can also see themselves.

SPEAKER_01 12:29

That's awesome. What are you hoping that kids will take away from this? Because I think this is inspiring, not just for children, for adults as well. Um, I think we all need to practice more acceptance, uh, regardless of whether there's difficulties or or facial differences or whether people are in a wheelchair or hearing aids, regardless. We all need to practice more acceptance. What are you hoping the children will take away from this?

SPEAKER_02 13:00

Um, I'm really hoping each character says like an affirmation statement, like, I am feisty, I am brave, I am courageous. And so that's something that I felt was really important to have in the book, and that the reader would be able to read those things. And, you know, they might look like this character, but they might read, you know, this character who's like, I'm creative, and they're like, I'm creative, and that they would just begin to recognize like those positive characteristics in themselves and in their friends.

SPEAKER_01 13:24

Yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure. And I think even for adults too, sometimes we look at the glass half half empty instead of you know, half full. So I think the message goes across. But I really encourage people to buy the book uh for your children, for your grandchildren. I bought it for my granddaughter. Um, again, kids are our kids are kids. They're so they can be so loving. It's, you know, and so accepting. And I think this is such a great message because she saw this and she thought, yeah, that's how it should be. You know, it's like, you know, what what you know, I understand this. This is good because she saw, like, what is the the problem, you know, accepting these children. And that's what we want to protect. And that's the kind of message we want to give kids. I know when I was in high school, there were all kinds of students. I was in LA, right? And all kinds of students from all kinds of places, right? But at the time when we were in high school, we really didn't see our differences. We didn't see skin color, we didn't see anything. We were especially in the the drama group that we were in, we were like a family since junior high all the way through high school. We never saw those differences. And then when we went to our reunion like 30 years later, and we looked around, we thought, gosh, it's so diversified, we're so different. And yet we never saw it when we were in high school. Yeah, because it was normal. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. So, um, so this is awesome. So uh, Becky, if people wanted to purchase the book, how would they go about it? Is it is it for sale right now on Amazon or is it going to be it will be the paperback will be on Amazon in June.

SPEAKER_02 15:05

Um, hardcover is exclusively available on my website, which is wonderfullymebooks.com, and that's already available. I've got 300 books in my closet waiting to be mailed. Oh, that's awesome.

SPEAKER_01 15:17

That is awesome. Now, what was one of your favorite? You said you're you and your sister liked reading books. What was a favorite book of yours with your sister?

SPEAKER_02 15:27

And I'm like, I don't know what a favorite book would have been, but as a parent, like I'd started buying some of the same books that we read just for my own children. So one of the books, well, a lot of the books I realized had characters who had wheelchairs in them, uh-huh, which I didn't notice that. I think my mom just did that intentionally, and it was so normal to us. It's like there's a lot of children's books with wheelchairs. There's probably 10, and we owned all 10 of them. But one of the books was Heidi, which that's a classic. So I read that to my kids and I couldn't remember anything about it. But there's a character who's in a wheelchair, um, and just being out with Heidi in the mountains and the sunshine and the fresh air and the goat's milk or whatever. Um, her body is healed and she's able to walk. And so when her dad comes to pick her up, she walks to meet him.

SPEAKER_01 16:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:09

Um, and that was really powerful reading that, you know, just a few months ago and realizing, like, oh my goodness, that is my sister's story because my sister was in a wheelchair. And then one day at youth group we prayed for her and she got up and walked. And my mom came and she walked to meet her. And I was like, So, yeah. Wow.

SPEAKER_01 16:24

Yeah, reading that story is like, oh my goodness, like it is true. I remember Heidi, the story, the book, and also the movie. And I'm trying to think who did that. There were probably different renditions of it, but again, Heidi never saw, I think it was Clara, wasn't it Clara? The the little girl in the wheelchair, might have been Clara, but um, Heidi didn't see her as you know, someone in a wheelchair, she just saw her as another little girl, like, come on, let's go do things. You know, it's like, what's keeping you, you know, kind of thing, where she kind of thought, well, I can't do that. And Heidi was like, Why not? Why couldn't you? You know, I'll help you. Yeah. It was wonderful how she encouraged her. So I know that this book is gonna encourage a lot of kids, and it's going to also encourage those children that perhaps don't have any differences to accept and support children that need that as well. So that's been a big thing for us, you know.

SPEAKER_02 17:21

Because we like my daughter's, you know, best friend has Down syndrome, and my kids have no idea what Down syndrome is. Like we never discussed it. It's just, you know, that's what she looks like, that's how she acts, you know.

unknown 17:31

Right.

SPEAKER_02 17:31

You'll see another child who has Down syndrome and be like, she looks like our friend. And we're like, yep, but it's like it's so normal to them that they don't realize that she's different.

SPEAKER_01 17:38

Yeah, for sure, for sure. So, in order to get a copy of the hardcover, like the the one that I have that I'm holding up on video, but you can't see it on the podcast. Um, this one they can get exclusively from your website. So tell us again what your website is. Wonderfullymebooks.com. Awesome. Wonderfullymebooks.com.

SPEAKER_02 18:00

And then the paperback will be available where Amazon and Barnes and Nobles and Walmart and Target and all those places.

SPEAKER_01 18:09

Oh my gosh, that'll be awesome. And you'll you'll be able to identify it quickly from the cover because it's a beautiful outdoor picture that's beautifully illustrated with lots of children. There's probably a dozen children there, and there's a couple of dogs there too. Yes, and it's very colorful with green grass and blue sky and clouds, and it says in big letters, it's almost the top half of the book says wonderfully different, wonderfully me. And it, of course, it's got Becky's name on the bottom. Becky. Yeah, Zingali. This is Zingali. Zingali. I said it right. Wow, because I used to butcher names. Zingali. Becky Zengali is the author of the book. I encourage you to get a copy, get a couple of copies for your kids, your grandkids. I think it has a powerful, powerful message, and this can begin to create some positive change, right? So these children, you know, need to be accepted and loved. And I think it's a great way to encourage all children to see the positive, as you said, Becky, see the positive because we all have something to contribute, right? We all have something to contribute. Any last words, anything that you would love for the audience to walk away with or remember or consider? What would be some last words?

SPEAKER_02 19:28

Well, I guess if we wanted to tie in what you said about seeing obstacles, opportunities. For us, one of the obstacles was that we didn't see our daughter represented in a book. And so that was an opportunity for us to create a book. Um, so I think really just looking around at life and seeing the things that bug you, and how can you be the solution? How can you fix it?

SPEAKER_01 19:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:48

What can you do to help?

SPEAKER_01 19:50

Those are good words. Good words. Becky is truly an honor. Thank you so much for being on the podcast and sharing a little bit about the story that uh really brought about this wonderful book. And thank you for publishing this book. I know publishing book books, it's not an easy path, but thank you for doing it. And I think it was a labor of love for you as well, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Awesome. So thank you so much, Becky. I really appreciate it. And thank you, everyone. Be sure to get a hold of the book. I'll put the links in the show notes to make it really easy for you. And if you forget and you're listening on Amazon, you can always go to my website, marissa shadrick.com. You'll see a button where it says podcast, and you can see the most recent episode and all the other episodes as well. So thank you, Becky, so much. And thank you, everyone, for listening. Yeah, thank you.